Faith or Madness by Sarah Ettritch

Author:Sarah Ettritch
Language: eng
Format: epub
Tags: urban fantasy, religion, canada, female protagonist, supernatural mystery, mystery supernatural

*****

Roberta dropped her purse onto the sofa and turned to Ben. “You could have been a little more supportive,” she said, voicing the words she’d wanted to spit at him all night.

“They were right, though.” Ben shoved his hands into his pockets.

“Who cares if they were right?” Roberta said, noticing that he’d known exactly what she was talking about without her having to spell it out. “You should have stood up for me, for us, not told them you agreed with them and it’s all my fault we live together out of wedlock. I didn’t force you to do it. And why the hell did you tell them about the dream? Why did you tell them I’m stressed about not finding a job?”

“Because I’m worried about you.” Ben rocked on his heels. “You’ve been distracted lately. Preoccupied. I thought you’d jump into planning our wedding, but you don’t seem interested. If I hadn’t remembered to pick up your engagement ring, I doubt you would have reminded me. So I talked to your parents. I told them you didn’t seem yourself, that’s all.”

The concern on his face defused Roberta’s anger. He cared about her. She should be talking to him, not to Cindy and some dream analyst she didn’t know. She perched on the sofa’s arm and considered how much to tell him. “I think God’s trying to speak to me, that He wants to use me in some way.”

“God uses all of us,” Ben stated.

“I think he wants to use me in a specific way.” A special way. “Your Deiforms.” The Deiform Fellowship. What did it mean?

“How is He trying to reach you?”

“It’s this dream. It’s—”

Ben’s eyes flashed. “Don’t tell me you think God’s trying to speak to you through a dream. It’s just a stupid, recurring dream.”

“Forget the dream, then. I feel I’m at a crossroads, that my life is going to change.”

He pulled his hand from his pocket and jabbed his finger at her. “What are you doing to change your life? If you’re supposed to be doing something different, why aren’t you figuring out what it is? Why are you sitting on your ass waiting for something to change?”

“Because—”

“Because it’s not true,” Ben shouted. Then he shook his head. “Damn it.” He walked up the hallway that led to the bedroom and bathroom, then returned and slowly exhaled. “You’ve grown distant since I proposed. I’m starting to think you don’t want to marry me.”

“That’s not true. It has nothing to do with you.”

“Are you sure?”

No, she wasn’t. She wasn’t sure about anything. Frustrated, she blinked back tears.

Ben’s face softened. “Look, let’s say you’re right. Let’s say your days as a cashier are over and you’re on the verge of something new. That’s okay. We’ll deal with whatever it is.”

She didn’t like his choice of words. “I know you’d like a traditional wife, someone who’ll have all the time in the world for you, the home, children. What if I have to work long hours? What if having children won’t make sense?”

Ben’s mouth pressed into a thin line.

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